Ownership

I saw something on twitter the other day which made me laugh... but in all reality it's actually kind of sad. In our society, in the absence of something to say or do, we often fall back on words like "let me know if you need anything". This statement seems caring and helpful... but in reality puts the ownership back on the person we're trying to assist. It's simply not helpful.

Megan Devine (@refugeingrief) suggests offering tangible help - options like "can I bring you dinner next Tuesday night", or "I'll be coming by at 4pm to walk your dog for you", or "I'll pick up your kids from daycare today".

In Canadian society, we may think these statements are too presumptuous... but really, they offer kind & tangible ways in which you can actually come through for someone.

If you put the ownership on the bereaved, you may never hear from him/her, but that doesn't mean they don't need you. Also, you don't know what you may get back - see here for a twitter snapshot & cautionary tale: