Colleagues

A co-worker is a strangely intimate relationship... not friendship, in that a colleague is not likely to be your most trusted confidante. And certainly not tied to each other by a bond of wedding vow or blood relation.

And yet, in some regards I think our colleagues know us better than those closest to us. When I come into my office, I often share details about my evening. What filled my hours between leaving the day prior until the moment I stepped foot back into the building.

My best friends don't get that level of detail (in fact, we only really catch up once a month - if we're lucky!), and my parents and siblings certainly don't hear about trips to the mall, or funny incidents when picking up my daughter from school.

So it is a closeness of obligation, but an authentic bond nonetheless.

I have had two colleagues die during my tenure at McMaster. I didn't know either one too well, but interacted with both frequently. And at very odd times, I still find myself thinking about them. Not in depth, not in a way that changes my day, but thinking about either one out of the blue is a very odd situation to encounter. And with each moment that gives me pause, a very strange emotion also comes with it. Guilt. Who am I to have these weird pangs of grief? I barely knew him/her!

Bizarre right?